Dating someone with 4 kids

It was a long wait — we are both in our mid-40s — but well worth it. I had never dated anyone with children, and I never wanted my own. She’d called when we were driving to the Mark Taper Forum in downtown Los Angeles, and we put her on speakerphone while I remained silent because she didn’t yet know her dad was dating.As we inched along the 405 Freeway, my anxiety increased.As part of an entrepreneurial project, David’s elder was selling homemade lip gloss, and when I offered to buy some, her sister said, “Well, it’s kinda like you’re family, so you should get the family discount! I knew I’d fall for David from the moment we met, but I had no idea I’d fall in love like this: utterly openhearted to his two beautiful girls. I’m a little bit jealous, because mothers and fathers have a clear role.

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News flash: A significant portion of the population are not nurturers by nature and won’t make good, nurturing parents.

I’m thinking of workaholics, angry/bitter-prone personalities, and impulsive, always-looking-for-the-party personalities.

They bicker and I remain silent, allowing him to parent as he sees fit.

This is not to say I’m invisible, merely respectful. I resist my own nature and slow down, try to remain responsive to the girls’ needs, subordinate my own. A.” plan: Dodgers games and UCLA basketball, school plays and holiday events, and it’s just as easy to get tickets for four.

The first time I attended a school play, David’s daughter came out after the show.

I wanted to run over and hug her, give her the flowers we brought, congratulate her on a good performance — until I saw her mom and realized that my desires were tertiary.

For some of you, the risk is worth it; for others, it’s not.

Prior to meeting this new person, did you know that you wanted kids?

“I know it’s against your nature,” she said,”but when it comes to his kids, be a cat, not a dog.

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